emo photos:

28.06.2009: important things first. i'm now in roskilde until the 6th of july. then i'll be in norway from the 15th to the 23rd, when i'm flying back to england for an as yet unknown period of time. make plans.

all this running around, what i'll miss most is the ocean (actually a sea). the perfect gradient, sandy green to deep terrifying blue slashed with pale blue and gold where the sky reflects in the chops. the seas constant barrage. watching the horizon disappear behind the waves. them gliding along and gracing the underside of the jetty. all those bubbles and power, and we just jump around screaming like kids. there's little else for it.

and the courtyard slowly becomes covered in chalk graffiti. tattooed by children. although on closer inspection it's mostly the adults. all those creepy monsters. sharp bloody teeth and crazed eyes. all tentacles and claws. and you wonder why your kids can't sleep? the cocktail of adult fear and baby scrawl, it's like a madman loose in the courtyard. chalk for fingers and toes.

give me the acordian player any day.

it's 9am and someone is playing very loud very fast house (i'm not actually in roskilde yet). there's a festival in christiania this weekend, but i don't think the music could reach us from there. and there's all the graduating school kids driving around in their trucks and screaming. again. like it never gets boring.

i guess i should get moving.

if i did twitter or facebook, i'd probably write "laurence is looking forward to the dandy warhols' cover of blackbird". but even this is too much acknowledgement.

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24.06.2009: at long last being stung by the summer (forearms, that's cycling for you). this is fantastic. but i'm not happy until the air is too hot to breathe.

we fled to the beach. on our rickety bikes. i'm almost surprised we made it. crushed between sky and sand. ever shrinking testes. trying to avoid the riff-raff.

language class is a pause in my day. it'd be dull but everyone has gone to test and i'm the only person there. i wanted to leave early, but i couldn't waste a one-on-one lesson. it was brilliant.

sitting across the lake from the bonfire, it sending black flakes into the sky, over the water towards us. emil managed to swallow one (by accident, of course). something about burning witches. the trailer for a sigur ros video.

then today. work started at 9:30am in fisk and ended at 7pm in studenterhuset. bad timing, two volunteer shifts in a row. and with the glorious weather everywhere but inside customers are a rare commodity. why am i even bothering?

anyway. the best thing about adapting comic books into movies is it can't fuck up the original for you. you can't badly cast a person into a role whose face you can never shake when reading the book. maybe it can ruin the voices, but i've never really attributed voices to comic characters. but try reading harry potter without picturing the film cast.

and if you can guess what book's adaptation has triggered me to think about this i'll buy it you. i love it that much. i don't even own a copy. and you know what? the trailer doesn't even look that bad (apart from the score). but still, it'll turn an incredible book into a hollywood movie. no matter how good it is it'll ruin the beauty and magic of one of my all time favourite books. i just can't watch.

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22.06.2009: in the end it was just one night. the best of two days. sitting around the barbecue, hoping another person isn't about to put their feet on it again, almost tipping it. hot coals rocking back and forth. sitting on the jetty. kissing the ocean (actually a sea), more like being bruised by the water. after the third dipping it feels like my skin is biting me. playing go. being shushed in the noisey silent train carriage. retreating to my book. fucking burgers man. and the biggest breakfast we could muster. fresh air. acorns on the roof. 24 stupid names written on tiny bits of paper in a pan. i had the best sleep.

i could have stayed longer. but i didn't.

and i only took 21 photos:

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is starting to seriously annoy/worry me.

coming back to copenhagen isn't so bad. big meals. rearranging the courtyard. all these things. i can't even remember what i was doing all day. it was just nice. and all this afternoon has been spent in the courtyard again. hanging out with various neighbours, talking over our dinners, sharing wine. what the courtyard should be. anyway.

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19.06.2009: so i had this great idea for a nsfw html attribute. but then i realised it's actually quite obvious and a thousand people must have thought of this before. of course it has. but it seems very recent news that it's going to be in HTML5. i read up on it, and everyone seems to be talking a whole load of shit. i've stayed out of this kind of blogging for a long time and now i'm reminded why. the world is full of half-arsed twitters that explain nothing. you can't link to this crap by way of any explanation. it's all just jizz. you're all scum.

anyway, my idea was simple. if you have content you think is not safe for work then you add a 'nsfw' attribute to the tag. i'm thinking of images here (using this for links is nothing but idiocy, don't even discuss it. the idea is retarded and pointless). all you need is a simple firefox extension that recognises the tag and only displays the image if you click on it. if you wanted to be fancy it could use pixelation, with a resolution that increases each time you click on it. of course it relies on the webmaster marking offensive images, and i'm sure the majority of people posting nasty images on the internet can't html for shit (yes, 'html' is also a verb). but you're not going to get a better solution.

it seemed clever to begin with. then i got angry.

but just imagine an image search option that allows you to search for only nsfw pictures. that would be brilliant.


anyway, this week we're at a summer house down south and can't particularly be contacted. be satisfied that i'm having fun and plenty of vege burgers. hopefully some sunshine and some beach. and when i'm back we must discuss england and the escaping from it.

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18.06.2009: the potatoes are singing to me. and the clouds have stolen the last of the day's sunshine.

the soap smells of blue cheese. my shoes still stiff from the rain.

evidently, in denmark the summer solstice becomes the start of the summer. something is a little too suffocating about this.

and the thing is, no matter how empty a tube of toothpaste is you can always squeeze out some more. i'm surprised the toothpaste industry didn't collapse long ago.

so the peanut butter jar keeps the current page fast, whilst the vegemite holds down the previous page. the pot of welsh honey is keeping the loose pages secure. my sweatshop army of condiment workers.

at least we have billie and ella. amongst eight crates of beer past their sell-by date. so i'm just useless here, whilst no one is paying me any attention. you have to stock rotate, in your stock room if nowhere else.

the guy in store. he's buying three cans of beer, three blocks of butter, two bags of licorice, and a bottle of oil.

"du har nu mindre end fem og tyve kroner tilbage pa din konto."

why does everyone stop dancing when the good songs finally come on? and how do girls do it, how they dance like their top half and bottom half have been seperate?

we're all saved by the ripest sharron fruit, dripping juices everywhere on everything (and in the most beautiful of dreams, everyone).

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14.06.2009: all you need is a couple of consecutive sleepless nights and nothing. vacuous anachronistic sludge. 'dreams' on a five second tape loop. squelching through the fucking rain.

you find yourself in a bar with horny crimson skulls covering the walls. doll's heads for lampshades, their indentations lightly scorched. glaring a raw red around the eye sockets. fantastic beer though.

or a fishy basement, discussing how to deal with five crates of out-of-date beer.

or i could just keep staring off into the middle distance. i don't know.

in moments of clarity we go to the coffee collective and a tiny shop that exclusively sells independent danish comics and art. a shop that makes its own caramels. the rain eases up, but only briefly.

then waking up at half four in the morning to the bloodhound gang at full volume. me, plus everyone else who lives in this building. actual full volume. someone shouting especially loud over "burn mother fucker, burn". the apartment suddenly smelling of spray paint and there's a double sheet emblazoned with a huge swastika gaffa taped to the kitchen wall.

we managed a dinner party. but what we really managed was two large shepherds pies between the four of us. no leftovers, no surrender. this was when we covered emil's room with 400 dumpster dived post-it notes, all screaming "baesj". the post-its were my idea, but it was alex's endeavour. the large unfolded cardboard box with huge letters cut out (yes, to spell "baesj"), well that was all me. sorry.

and the french band. so very french. they couldn't have been more french had they been playing baguettes with strings of onions.

ducks with yellow eyes. elderflower ice lollies.

new rule: everytime i bookmark a page i must delete two bookmarks.

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12.06.2009: i guess what i'm feeling is disenchanted. let down by a summer fallen lame by the wayside. all this rain is just pathetic fallacy. and very wettening.

this is why i'm writing in bed. just try and give me a reason to get up. there's not even any point in raising the blinds. we're trapped in the grey. summer has left for more adjective pastures. a more comparative love affair.

i've had all spring to play in the cold rain. it's really not necessary in june. and it makes me miss toronto, watching videos of asofterworld and slideshows of critical masses, all of it in glorious warm sunshine. and when it rains there, it rains like it's the end of the world. not this cheap english knock-off shite. infact, i'm wondering why it's england that has the reputation for bad weather.

anyway. i feel like i'd been eating well recently, so i just wrote up a list of everything i've eaten so far this week:

tuesday:
- homdemade museli with rice milk
- yesterday's curry leftovers (mix vegetables with tomato, coconut and soya yoghurt sauce)
- two carrots, a lot of raw brocolli, two celery sticks
- wholemeal pasta with spinach, sunflower seeds and sesame seeds
- fried egg on bread

wednesday:
- banana and avocado rice-milk smoothie
- lots of homdemade humus on bread
- wholemeal pasta with vege meatballs, lots of tomatoes and vegetables
- more humus

thursday:
- homemade museli with rice milk
- egg and humus sandwich
- soya milk smoothie with carrot, apple and kiwi
- yesterday's pasta leftovers

shame i haven't eaten any lentils yet this week. that'd make me really look like a hippy. and same kale would be nice too.

i also wanted to say how brilliant my new language class is. like i've finally come far enough to deserve decent lessons. there's still one asshole (a new one), but he's going to test soon and will hopefully be gone. and anyway, he's nowhere near as bad as the ukrainian idiot, who will hopefully remain rude in module 2. forever. the new teacher is engaging and interesting and she picked me up on my 'u' before i could say "uger". and she's not afraid to pull faces.

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