09.04.06: we're having a lot of fun here. but more on that another day. my website has finally qualified for attention from google. attention in the shape of an email sitting in my inbox. one of those emails that's points you towards google's quality guidelines and tells you you've been a naughty boy.

i had content hidden in a div that had been moved past the left of the screen. external style sheets and all that. it's not like i tried anything clever to hide the fact i was doing it (i can be as crude as i want on my own site). removing the hidden text isn't a problem, it's all bullshit and was soley to improve my adsense context, something i should be able to do more effectively with google_ad_section_start(weight=ignore), but it doesn't actually work. if you're interested the terrible content i had is as follows. it's quite embaressing. you'd think i might do something a little more intelligent wouldn't you?

emo clothing in your holy water emo style. (this was never supposed to be a blog or adverts for emo clothing). listen to emo music. like i said, emo girl, emomilk, whatever. rock'n'roll emo clothes fashion style. this is laurence's blog or something. no emo clothes or emo t-shirt. we have emo t-shirts and emo shoes. its not emo emo music, but whatever. pictures and emo photos and already too much emo clothing crap. emo clothes but not emo, okay? punk.

buy malarone uk search engine optimiser analyst cv larium side effects buy imodium ad advanced buy doxycycline side effects uk online buy anti malaria tablets cheap cheap acne treatment

you can find other malarone information there. and elsewhere for emo clothing, emo t-shirts and indie stuff. all your girl emo t-shirt. emo.ware.org indie clothes too.

now don't get me wrong, i like a couple of emo bands but don't look emo
emo photo
i don't have emo t-shirts but my use of the word emo (in 'emo ware') has nothing to do with emo bands, emo music, emo fashion, emo pictures or whatever. it's a stupid historical thing before emo apparel or emo t-shirt even existed. all you emo girls
emo girl
were a twinkle in your mothers eye. emo milk had nothing to do with emotional lactose. then i started liking a couple of emo bands, y'know.. like far or whatever. jonah kind of pissed me off but nevermind. he doesn't even wear emo sneakers or trainers or whatever. emo glasses are fun, everyone loves emo t-shirts. and emo clothes arn't nerdy. emo clothing store. nor are stupid emo pins or badges trainers. it's not like i care though, honestly. i just wish call this contextual advertising?! indie clothing. stupid indie clothes.

incredible isn't it? i should have known better. ha. but like they say, if it ain't broked don't fix it. or something like that anyway. but you learn from your mistakes, don't hide content kids!

now i have the annoying task of going through all my old pages, sigh. and i'm in norway all next week with no internet or computer.

poo burp


other important areas of my site:

emo photos:


boys and girls, here's a brief selection of emo photos

emo photo emo photo photograph emo photograph emo girl emo girl emo hair emo hair style
emoware
emo band emo band
emo picture

emo image

emo clothes
emo boy emo boy

Other stuff: sweden cycling - drunken butterfly - dumpster diving / fnb - rss feed

03.09.2010: google webmaster central enables you to see the top searches that your website appears in. this can be useful because these searches can obviously be very different to the ones that drive your traffic (i.e. if your click rate is very low for them). anyway, here's the interesting thing, you can break it down by country. so here is how my website appears in various google results around the world:

USA - emo girls, cat man, girls without clothing
UK - malarone, malarone tablets, gash
Denmark - cult shaker, ungdomshuset, anarki
Indonesia - graffiti emo, grafity emo, emo girl style
India - a boy removing girls clothing, girls on beach without clothes, hot girls wallpapers without any clothes
Australia - emo photography, gash, rainbow patterns
Canada - cn tower, emo girls, bear cubs
Germany - emo girls, dumpster diving, hitler emo
Mexico - emo girl fashion, punks, ya basta
Netherlands - graffiti, designer toys, doxycycline dosage
France - art toys, emo girl fashion, emo clothes
Malaysia - emo shoes, punk nazi, norway

what does it mean? well there's a lot of boring stuff i could write about the subtlies of ranking for different terms, my ranking power in the UK, etc. but i think most of it comes down to the difference between what the people in a country are searching for and what local websites are optimising for. if people in denmark are searching for 'cult shaker' but no one is optimising for it, stupid websites like mine are going to show up. but it's strange, because i clearly don't rank for some of the terms it claims i do (average number one position in the last month for "rape ass", i don't think so).





02.09.2010: so i'm just waiting. i'm waiting to go to france. waiting for my rubik's cubes to arrive, waiting for books at the library. i'm waiting to hear back about this job that i (actually) really want. waiting to get better at danish. waiting for winter, waiting to get old.

my blog just turned nine years old. for a minute i freaked out because i thought it was ten, as if that makes a difference. but nine years of my garbage. it's almost 4mb of ascii (i stopped counting words a long time ago).

and i've actually had a website since i was 14. so i've now had a website longer than i haven't. there's something so very wrong about that sentence. i don't know.

i just wish i could sleep. why am i up writing this at 5am anyway?

waiting for morning..





31.08.2010: the trick is not to fall asleep when there's a mosquito in the room. to not try and pretend that it doesn't exist. or that it will go away. the trick is to hunt that pinpoint piece of shit down and smear it over every surface. spread it into nothingness. it's almost a shame they're not bigger so you can really grind them into the dust. feel the life leave them as you squeeze and pummel. see the blood squirt, gushing from their spiracles, compound eyes fragmenting and popping.

anyway. can't blame me not being able to sleep completely on the flies.

our sunday gig went really well. there's a clear difference between a gig at 2am and one at 2pm. funny that. but it was the success we needed. and the most i've ever sweated on stage. also the sweetest guitar sound i've ever had. when we left the venue it was still daylight. as if it was morning or something.

eating all the pizza, falafel and fries we could. and playing one card passing on the train, which must have a better name. either that or it's just a stupid game someone made up in school, which isn't so unlikely given how dumb it is. new variation, you don't see your own card, you stick it on your head for everyone else to see. real dumb.

i just clicked on one of kellog's adwords and it went to a 502. someone should tell them.

this is so boring right now.

has anyone got boltcutters or a angle grinder i could borrow? um, no reason.

oh yeah, also we were around our neighbours for dinner monday night. that was very nice. good wine, lasagna. all very grown up. uninteresting for you, but i wanted to make a note, y'know.





26.08.2010: i thought that by the time i was say 25 years old, i'd be done with worrying about exams and thesis deadlines. having not done your homework. but still i'm dreaming about it all the time. at an almost worrying regularitly.

also i'm missing my old friends. i dream about them a lot too. i dream about me and corey hanging out in rugby like we're 13 again.

and then there's the case of the hateful bitch from across the way (unfortunately not a dream). this bitch who decided to accuse me of asking her to use a different table in the courtyard, because apparently i've presumed that table belongs to us. it would have been ok, only she did it infront of everyone at the general meeting when i wasn't there (also the story is not true). then she went on to complain that the plants aren't being watered enough. someone had to explain that it's done on a voluntary basis, and it's only actually julie that does it. because all of you are so fucking useless. anyway, we confronted her about this the day after and she was completely unreasonable. she went on the offensive, and you can tell when someone is lacking in maturity when they claim that you need to grow up. i tried to explain to her how disappointed i was with her behaviour, but she said she wasn't going to have the discussion in english. this whole time she was walking backwards away from us. why are these people so full of hate?

and this is something i recently realised about denmark, whilst writing my fifth "klag" (letter of complaint) for class, the danish people love to complain about everything whilst doing nothing themselves to actually solve the problems. as if complaining makes themselves look better, distracts from the fact that they're fucking useless. that they've been resting too long on what might once have been a decent welfare state. expecting everyone else to run around and fix things for you. it's pathetic.

so the plan is to make me a nice bronze plague. "laurence's table". screw it on tight. maybe engrave something in some letters like "if you wish to use the table please contact..". that's exactly kind of humour we need in our courtyard.





25.08.2010: my ipod is officially dead. it's been dead a few months now, the screen displaying an image of an ipod with crosses for eyes. it's almost cute. you can hear the harddrive trying to spin up. fail. but it lasted over six years so i won't complain (why do we so readily except things not lasting anymore?). needless to say i wont be replacing it. it's still pretty though.

any ideas of things to do with dead ipods?

or i was going to write about our first chat roulette experience. but really, what is that point? nexted, masturbating, nexted, topless guy, nexted, masturbating, nexted, etc. the longest chat was with this guy who kept pointing a gun at his head. and no matter how hard i begged him he wouldn't pull the trigger.

so i went back to the gym. i ran. and we had the first drunken butterfly practice in about two months. we had fun. it was as if we'd never left. and speaking of which there's also a new drunken butterfly comic. nice link, see what i did there? also i'm very happy with the shading. and tracing. nevermind. thank you batman and superman.





24.08.2010: head a warm fuzzing hollow. the wind shrieking all night. pulling the trees down. picking up cars and throwing them through our windows. i don't know. i'm imagining myself in all the beds i've ever slept in. most comfortable in my room on park crescent. for a while i forgot i wasn't there. half an hour it was a struggle to reimagine where i actually was. i picked the wrong room three times.

so where are we at? monsoon season.

we were on stage at 2am and it was far from ideal. the crowd was nice but stood three metres away from the stage. and they weren't the drunken crazies you'd expect. it was a good practice gig at least. and the food they made was superb.

we finally got home at 6:30am. stupid moose.

to make up for it we're playing at 2pm on sunday. that'll be interesting.

on sunday i made pie. i'm good at making pie. on monday i made a comic. i'm getting good at that too.





21.08.2010: no hesitation no delay, de oi!tonome (or however we spell our name these days) are playing tonight at ungdomshuset, dortheavej, or whatever they call it these days. apparently we're playing sometime after 1am. i'm not sure why i'm writing about this, since if there's any chance of you coming you already know about it anyway, but nevermind. we're playing new songs and will probably be very drunk by the time we go on stage. me especially, since i haven't been out drinking for weeks, literally, and i'm going to need all the energy to stay awake long enough to play.

btw, we're also playing next sunday at the paramount diy festival in roskilde.

what else? last week i interviewed kieth mchenry for the dumpster diving blog. he's one of the original founders of food not bombs, and as such has a lot of interesting things to say on the matters of dumpsters and redirecting food from landfills to the hungry. check it out.

and me? floating around. give me a project to do. engage me.

oh yeah, a new drunken butterfly comic:



you should have seen my danish test results. i had almost full marks on the reading and listening. right across the board. and my first written exercise was great. only the second one was the worst piece of shit i've ever written. in any language. i can't even explain why. i just crashed halfway through. it's like i wrote the same three words over and over again. and i didn't even go in for the oral yet. so i've passed half of the fourth module. meh.





17.08.2010: the summer is pissing itself away. let it. pretend like i care. blah blah. we did our bit. even if we have nothing to show for it.

i've been kayaking in the danish sea. basking in the swedish sun. cycling to fucking norway. swimming in their lakes. desecrating memorials in berlin. drinking all of their alcohol. i've survived another roskilde. we saw whales in the atlantic. i ate pizza in new york. we wrote a song or two. i read your book. i didn't cry at the end. i probably just failed my danish exam. and i look like i care.

aubergines. i've been craving so many aubergines.

and i'm still to go to france (september 7th to 18th). it'll be summer there. people will be warm and happy. there will be figs and grapes. olives yet to harvest. i will beat you at backgammon and othello and dominoes. there will be dancing. and so many comics.



































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